I'm Robert G. I'm a web developer/designer. I moved to Chicago in 2012, without knowing anyone here. I grew up in NYC. I used to work at Manhunt. I am Tumblr # 156. I am Black and Irish. I play lots of video games and drink lots of booze. I am a cool guy.

  1. When I die, put a Hotwives of Orlando gif on my tombstone.

    When I die, put a Hotwives of Orlando gif on my tombstone.

  2. A list of current Comedy Central show hosts that I would like to have sex wtih

    1. Chris Hardwick
    2. Derek Waters
    3. Jordan Peele
    4. NOT Nathan Fielder
  3. submitted by winterlong

    Your arms are bigger than mine, so it probably looks more impressive.

    Like everyone who has ever gone to the gym, I feel like I have tiny malnourished baby arms. I have considered gaining weight solely for the 20 lbs = 1 inch of arm diameter rule. 

  4. I just coughed up a puff of smoky powder

    Protip: mix creatine into your protein shakes, as opposed to taking it in vitamin form 

  5. submitted by dinosaurduplex

    Are you excited to see dinosaurduplex next week?

    I’m excited. I’m so excited, I’m already converting all my pants into assless chaps. 

  6. Sitting at home, rubbing my legs after Rugby. Ask Me Anything

  7. Nothing makes me feel older than reading people on tumblr complaining about “group projects”

  8. A game I like, La Mulana, kickstarted a sequel, where one of the awards was to have your face turned into a statue. They just posted an updated about it, which included: “If you’d like to become a giant stone face, we suggest taking your photos with lighting coming more from the bottom up”, and other things like “Just keep in mind that if you send us weird faces, we’ll stick your face in weird places." Cute.  
But then it says “Regarding hairstyles, we just want you to know that styles like dreadlocks and afros will be hard for us to work with. Please just try to see things from our perspective. As long as you can see your face though, we’ll work around the hair and give you an interesting headpiece in place of your ‘do." Which is real fucking specific about what kind of hairstyle is hard for them. Not sure why dreadlocks would be harder than long hair.
So, anyway, long story short, now I want to send them more money and grow an afro, because I want an awesome afro statue in their Indiana Jones game and I think the world would be better off for it. 

    A game I like, La Mulana, kickstarted a sequel, where one of the awards was to have your face turned into a statue. They just posted an updated about it, which included: “If you’d like to become a giant stone face, we suggest taking your photos with lighting coming more from the bottom up”, and other things like “Just keep in mind that if you send us weird faces, we’ll stick your face in weird places." Cute.  

    But then it says “Regarding hairstyles, we just want you to know that styles like dreadlocks and afros will be hard for us to work with. Please just try to see things from our perspective. As long as you can see your face though, we’ll work around the hair and give you an interesting headpiece in place of your ‘do." Which is real fucking specific about what kind of hairstyle is hard for them. Not sure why dreadlocks would be harder than long hair.

    So, anyway, long story short, now I want to send them more money and grow an afro, because I want an awesome afro statue in their Indiana Jones game and I think the world would be better off for it. 

  9. There is GRASS. There is GRASS. ON MY LEG. FROM RUGBY PRACTICE. I was born in Manhattan. I don’t even know what grass is. When I first saw grass, I googled it. Where does it come from? Who planted it? Why haven’t we turned Central Park into a giant UNIQLO? 
But now there is FILTH on my LEG from a giant dirt patch and this is not okay. I am saran wrapping my legs before next practice. 

    There is GRASS. There is GRASS. ON MY LEG. FROM RUGBY PRACTICE. I was born in Manhattan. I don’t even know what grass is. When I first saw grass, I googled it. Where does it come from? Who planted it? Why haven’t we turned Central Park into a giant UNIQLO? 

    But now there is FILTH on my LEG from a giant dirt patch and this is not okay. I am saran wrapping my legs before next practice. 

  10. submitted by winterlong

    That's a little expensive to pee watch.

    I mean, I guess even if you buy cheap nosebleed tickets, you can still go down through the stadium and watch penises in the premium bathroom trough near the field. Where all the rich, successful penises are.