Alright, douchebags, listen up.
I am tired of you fuckers at the gym not using the smaller water fountain. At my gym, there are two water fountains. One is normal height. The other one is cripple height. As a man who is 5’11”, I have no problem bending down to use cripple-height fountain, especially if someone is using the big boy fountain.
HOWEVER FOR SOME FUCKING REASON I AM THE ONLY PERSON WHO WILL DO THIS
Lines fucking form around the big boy fountain when the reebo-height fountain is perfectly free. I cut said line, because I am a thirsty motherfucker after blasting my pecs, but then I feel like a wompwomp because I am drinking from the stunted-growth fountain that no one else will drink from. Then the fucking frat boys look at me, all like, “Hey, look at that fucking trainable drinking from the fetal-alcohol-syndrome-height fountain” and I’m like “LOOK DOUCHEBAG GO LISTEN TO NICKELBACK” but I don’t really say that, because the real revenge is success.
